That he'll be different with you? You two have things in common and he appreciates you 'for who you are'? Oh, he said that to me too, but you think he's different with you.
He's always there to lean on, he helps you and he knows just what you need and want. He's just so sincere, he even told you about his bad behaviour in the past.
Did he tell you how he slapped me? (I 'humiliated' him in public.)
Did he tell you how he also hit his ex-wife? (She provoked him.)
Yes he did...but hey we asked for it. He wouldn't be telling you if he hadn't changed, right?
He would never do that to you, because you're special.
So he takes responsibility for all his actions in the past now? BUT it was me who brought out his bad behaviour and you're different from me, he will not do that to you.
He will not HAVE to manipulate you into getting his own way, I was just being difficult and he had no choice. He will never have to beg for YOUR attention (Did he mention the first 3 years that I had to beg for HIS attention, before I turned 'all bad'?) Yes, he told you how his ex-wife just lay in bed reading books, never giving him or the children any attention, I know about that too. So you will never do that because you're different, he will not be cruel to you.
It doesn't matter to you that I'm hardly out of his life, and you're already in it. Abusers don't need YEARS of therapy, RIGHT? You're different, you'll support him and he won't abuse YOU.
He's had such a terrible life! You know...the part where his ex-wife left him on the night he took her out for their anniversary to be with another man, just cruel. . . and how I cheated on him behind his back for two years with a guy on the internet, how unforgivable.
It's just not possible that I could be SO emotionally unstable due to his abuse that I didn't care about anyone anymore. Well, did he tell you about the girl before me? Yes, the one who 'lost it' and ended up being treated in a mental institution for 6 weeks, guess we BOTH had a problem, right?
I bet he's already told you that the real reason for me treating him so badly NOW is because I am jealous of YOU and that I even said 'It will never work'...so you're going to 'prove me wrong', right?
We just didn't appreciate him, not with all of the suicide attempts he had to put up with, we put the poor guy through hell. You're nothing like that ofcourse, you're SPECIAL.
And so what that he was cruel to my little girl, so cruel that I lost care of her because of him, she was a spoiled brat anyway and he was getting back at me, that just makes it fair doesn't it? I mean he really adores his own kids and he's just a WONDERFUL father! Me and his ex-wife were both just bad mothers, so we 'left him with the kids'. Besides, the man you know won't do anything bad, he is just too sensitive and he's different with you.
He will never deliberately hurt you or use your family or friends against you, no, I must've brought that out in him.
Oh, he's been seeing a therapist because I left him and he's a wreck? He couldn't possibly be using it as a cover-up because his reputation looked so bad!
And he didn't deliberately go about to look for an intelligent, active women so he could punish them if they didn't direct ALL their energy towards him, or for a woman with a strong sense of responsibility, one he could manipulate to feel responsible for his sick feelings. No, this behaviour is in his past and he will not do that to you, you're special!
You have seen his tears...his oh-so-vulnerable side, that MUST mean he's sincere, right?
Yeah...sure he's made some mistakes in the past (we drove him to it), but it's in the past and he deserves forgiveness, but MY mistakes and my reactions to his abuse is absolutely unforgivable. Anyway, you are not like me and he won't think YOUR mistakes are unforgivable. I mean you're special and he REALLY loves you!
And if you one day did 'trigger' his bad behaviour and he says it's because you did something that reminded him of ME, well...then you'll change because you are different and you will be the woman he 'deserves', but he's not trying to change you or control you, he wouldn't do that to you, because you're special.
He's always there to lean on, he helps you and he knows just what you need and want. He's just so sincere, he even told you about his bad behaviour in the past.
Did he tell you how he slapped me? (I 'humiliated' him in public.)
Did he tell you how he also hit his ex-wife? (She provoked him.)
Yes he did...but hey we asked for it. He wouldn't be telling you if he hadn't changed, right?
He would never do that to you, because you're special.
So he takes responsibility for all his actions in the past now? BUT it was me who brought out his bad behaviour and you're different from me, he will not do that to you.
He will not HAVE to manipulate you into getting his own way, I was just being difficult and he had no choice. He will never have to beg for YOUR attention (Did he mention the first 3 years that I had to beg for HIS attention, before I turned 'all bad'?) Yes, he told you how his ex-wife just lay in bed reading books, never giving him or the children any attention, I know about that too. So you will never do that because you're different, he will not be cruel to you.
It doesn't matter to you that I'm hardly out of his life, and you're already in it. Abusers don't need YEARS of therapy, RIGHT? You're different, you'll support him and he won't abuse YOU.
He's had such a terrible life! You know...the part where his ex-wife left him on the night he took her out for their anniversary to be with another man, just cruel. . . and how I cheated on him behind his back for two years with a guy on the internet, how unforgivable.
It's just not possible that I could be SO emotionally unstable due to his abuse that I didn't care about anyone anymore. Well, did he tell you about the girl before me? Yes, the one who 'lost it' and ended up being treated in a mental institution for 6 weeks, guess we BOTH had a problem, right?
I bet he's already told you that the real reason for me treating him so badly NOW is because I am jealous of YOU and that I even said 'It will never work'...so you're going to 'prove me wrong', right?
We just didn't appreciate him, not with all of the suicide attempts he had to put up with, we put the poor guy through hell. You're nothing like that ofcourse, you're SPECIAL.
And so what that he was cruel to my little girl, so cruel that I lost care of her because of him, she was a spoiled brat anyway and he was getting back at me, that just makes it fair doesn't it? I mean he really adores his own kids and he's just a WONDERFUL father! Me and his ex-wife were both just bad mothers, so we 'left him with the kids'. Besides, the man you know won't do anything bad, he is just too sensitive and he's different with you.
He will never deliberately hurt you or use your family or friends against you, no, I must've brought that out in him.
Oh, he's been seeing a therapist because I left him and he's a wreck? He couldn't possibly be using it as a cover-up because his reputation looked so bad!
And he didn't deliberately go about to look for an intelligent, active women so he could punish them if they didn't direct ALL their energy towards him, or for a woman with a strong sense of responsibility, one he could manipulate to feel responsible for his sick feelings. No, this behaviour is in his past and he will not do that to you, you're special!
You have seen his tears...his oh-so-vulnerable side, that MUST mean he's sincere, right?
Yeah...sure he's made some mistakes in the past (we drove him to it), but it's in the past and he deserves forgiveness, but MY mistakes and my reactions to his abuse is absolutely unforgivable. Anyway, you are not like me and he won't think YOUR mistakes are unforgivable. I mean you're special and he REALLY loves you!
And if you one day did 'trigger' his bad behaviour and he says it's because you did something that reminded him of ME, well...then you'll change because you are different and you will be the woman he 'deserves', but he's not trying to change you or control you, he wouldn't do that to you, because you're special.
3 comments:
Awesome, woman. Awesome!! Brutally honest, and truthfull. The month is still an infant, but I am giving you my Screaming Eagle Award (if only in spirit). Stunning piece ... and peace!
Wow lol thank you Emil :o)
I love this post.
Of course every woman wants to think they are special and he'll be different with them.
She'll learn.
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