Monday, May 5, 2008

Arguments...

I can see another sleepless night coming. I'm getting more and more depressed every day. The hurt and pain is getting to me and I've been taking it out on Andy. I don't know how he puts up with this.
Friday night I went over to Catherine's and it all went wrong when all of them made Andy out to be lazy and irresponsible. I wanted to give up and go back to SA right then and there. I slept over there and didn't go home. I thought Andy had been lying to me but it turns out I got it all wrong. Still, we had a huge argument. When we finally talked things through I felt guilty. It was different for me, a normal argument. No violence or abuse.
Andy did promise me in the end that he'd go out on Tuesday and start looking for a steady work and I do want to trust him, but I have to admit that trust has always been an issue for me.

At the moment everything is just so difficult for me, I'm tired of ending up in dead-end streets. I'm tired of making phone calls and sending emails and never getting anywhere. When is this going to stop?

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi Cheekybum

Vertroue(Trust) is soos geloof in God. Dit is iets waarop jy hoop of glo nog voordat dit 'n realiteit geword het.

Renata S Roux said...

Dankie Riaan.

Dis al wat ek nog het om aan vas te klou, maar dankie vir die woorde.

Dit help wanneer ek soms voel ek wil opgee.