I suppose all of us grow up with hopes and dreams. I wonder how many people ever get to turn their dreams into reality in such an imperfect world.

Sometimes I look at people who walk past me and I wonder what their lives are like. I've met so many people in my past, people I will probably never see again. I used to look at their way of life and listen to their stories and pretended to be like them... I never was though.

I'm feeling more and more depressed as the days go by. I thought it would be better once I'm here with Andy, but it's not and although I understand in a way why it isn't, there is nothing I can do to make it better.

I still look at my past every day and ask myself what I ever did to deserve this. I can't do this anymore. I just can't.